Tag Archives: weight watchers

Sometimes You Really Are Hungry

Have you guys heard the acronym H.A.L.T.? I heard it in a Weight Watchers meeting the first time, though it is not strictly a WW thing. It is a checklist of sorts for determining if you should eat or not.

H… hungry
A… angry
L… lonely
T… tired

If you’ve ever struggled with weight you know that there are lots of times we eat for reasons other than hungry. We may be lonely (or anxious or feeling awkward in a social setting). We may be tired, or thirsty, or sad or angry or just want to treat ourselves. We often eat to celebrate, or to grieve, or to remember. We eat for many many reasons.

That is a lesson I understand. I am fully versed in eating for a host of reasons. But there is one lesson that I am still learning: Sometimes we want food because we really are HUNGRY. Duh. I don’t know why this is so strange but it happened to me again this afternoon.

I was driving E1 to choir and thinking about food. I wasn’t angry, or lonely. I am not terribly tired or stressed (any more than normal). I wasn’t thirsty – I had a liter of water with me in the car. Lunch was 4 hours ago, it turns out I really am hungry!

So often I think I have to wait to eat, that if I eat outside of my meals I will go crazy. I am not sure why I feel this way. More often than not if I have a snack in the afternoons I am better able to handle dinner, but hunger still takes my by surprise.

Sometimes I get uneasy allowing myself to eat when I am hungry, but slowly I am learning to recognize my bodies cues and giving myself permission to eat. When I got to choir I grabbed a protein bar and an apple for a snack and am writing a blog post while I wait for E1.

Hopefully having a snack will make tonight’s portion control easier.

Eating when you are hungry. What a concept.

(I am sometimes a slow learner)

(Also I am often Captain Obvious)

< WW Meeting Week 61 | Weight Watchers Weigh In Week 62 >

WW Meeting Weigh-In Week 67

Weight Watchers Meeting Weigh-In Week 67: Another week, another weigh in. Sometimes I am bogged down by the repetition of all of this…the tracking, the weigh ins, etc. But I do snap to my senses because what other choice do I have?

The choice is between doing the work and losing weigh and bouncing back up to 350+lbs. Seeing as I don’t like the way my body feels or looks, not to mention my health, at that weight it really isn’t an option. So I keep going, even though sometimes I still grieve how I used to eat. (Of course it is better to grieve it than to slip up and eat that way, which I have been known to do from time to time).

I never know quite what to expect by the scale, but I had a strong week. More eating than I ought, but I did track and I had plenty of Activity Points to help offset things. I was more worried about the fact that I had lost 5lbs in each of the last two WW weigh-ins and I know that that pace is impossible to keep up. And sure enough I had a small loss this week, but it is still a loss and I am happy about that.

-0.8 Pounds
89.2 lbs lost on WW to date

When I am tempted to get down on a loss like this week I remind myself that it is three sticks of butter and I feel a bit better. Beyond that though I worked really hard and I met my non-scale goal of reaching my goal step count each day (10,000).

Despite making the goal each day I can look at these fitbit summaries and see clearly which days I worked out and which days I had steps that were a function of my daily life with no extra movement. But working out each day wasn’t my goal, getting to 10,000 steps was.

WW Weigh In Week 66 | Weight Watchers Meeting Week 68

Weight Watchers Weigh In: Week 58

Weight Watchers Weigh-In, Week 58: Last week I did everything I was supposed to and gained weight. This week I had a virtually identical week point wise….and lost weight. Sometimes you just cannot predict what your body is going to do. Not only that, but I had a nice loss and a at a new “low” for my weight.

-4.4 Pounds
98.6 lbs Lost on WW to Date

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WW Weigh-in Week 4

Weight Watchers Weigh-in Week 4: The last two weeks have been a challenge. The sharp focus I had on my prize in early January began to blur, and my willpower was tested frequently by chocolate, carbohydrates of any kind, and ruthless woman named aptly named Ruthie who drags a red wagon full of Girl Scout Cookies through my office 12 times a day.

199 lbs
– 4 lbs total on Weight Watchers

Doubt, the anti-companion of any attempt I’ve ever made at weight loss waged its first attack in an all-too familiar internal battle: The part of me that thinks this is too hard and too overwhelming vs. the part of me that wants to believe it IS possible for me to reach a goal weight.

Monday night, my restlessness had reached critical mass and I knew that some kind of action was required. I took a long walk and weighed my options. There weren’t many of them.

  1. Quit
  2. Not Quit

As soon as I gave myself permission to think about it that way, like I had a choice in the matter, I knew exactly what I wanted.

I wanted to wear any dress from any store of my choosing to this year’s Christmas parties.

I wanted to know that my situation is not hopeless.

I wanted change.

I wanted the self-assurance I remember feeling two years ago when I had lost 55 pounds.

A memory of that time cut suddenly into my thoughts and I remembered a day when I’d gone to Charming Charlie’s and found the perfect pair of boots to slide over my size 10 skinny jeans. I don’t even like selfies, but I sure did take one and put it on the blog that day. Then I’d gone to Whole Foods and eaten lunch from the salad bar. It was incredible to feel so at home and so free and so in control of my own body.

(By the way, the expense of WW is all in the food, which you have to buy completely by yourself)

I clung to that memory for several blocks, running through it again and again, recounting the treasure of it, and each time different details came back to me and it would become more complete. I remembered that I’d found this joy over not needing unhealthy food. I really liked healthy food I and liked that I had become picky about what I put into my body. I enjoyed making sure vegetables were part of at least two meals a day.

The discovery of what a healthy body feels like had been nearly intoxicating and vastly more enjoyable than any high I’d ever gotten from processed sugar. At that very specific point in my journey, I didn’t know what it meant to feel angst over food choices. That battle had been won and the temptation of overeating had lost.

The sliver of hopefulness that came out of my reminiscing was just enough, and in a moment of clarity I knew I needed to fast on Tuesday. It would be a chance to detach from the intensity of losing weight and get a change of perspective. So I did. It was frustrating at moments. At others, it was awesome. When I fell into bed that night having proved to myself that I am not a slave to food, it was well worth it.

So I’m not quitting. Elle

Weight Watchers Weigh-In: Week 54

Weight Watchers Weigh-In Week 54: Another week, another weigh in. Does the monotony of these posts drive you nuts or do you look forward to seeing what I’ve done with my week? For the most part I love my weigh in days – not because I always do well but it is always a reset button – new points, a new chance at a good week.

The walked the fine line this week of too much food. I ate all my weekly points in one fabulous night out with the family, but then I used a few activity points and just in general pushed it with my portions. My estimating was sloppy. And last night I finally went over on ww points after having a crabby day and simply not caring enough to be strict on my portions.

As a result:

+.4 Pounds
94.0 lbs lost on WW to date

All gains are annoying but in the scheme of things this is salt and a bad night on Tuesday more than a failed week. Today was a better day and I was able to make good decisions all day long. Sometimes the greatest gift I can give myself is the ability to shrug off a ho hum week and start again.

I guess I can see the appeal of meal delivery diets, as counting points takes some effort. However, diets like Nutrisystem are expensive, and I’d like to stay with real food if possible.

It is hard to remember on hard days but there really is always a new chance to start over. A bad decision yesterday doesn’t mean I need to make one today.

So despite a slight gain I am doing fine. I am awash in non-scale victories – TWO pairs of size 18 pants fit me now, I am getting good comments from people I know, I am staying on top of things at work and feeling confident, my light is helping, my kids are currently well.

Oh, and the most exciting of all – I get to lead a small group discussion at Fitbloggin’ this year! Woohoo!

Sometimes our progress is not about the scale after all.

WW Weigh-In, Week 53 | Weight Watchers Weigh-in, Week 55 (missed meeting)

Weight Watchers Weigh-In: Week 53

Weight Watchers Weigh-In: Week 53 – Weight loss is a funny business. Sometimes it seems like there are no changes taking place, regardless of what the scale says. Other times things seem completely obvious. And most of the time you just feel like yourself.

I went to a party with some friends on Saturday night. I had a little cheesecake and some trail mix and used most of my weekly points. That was fine, I stayed close to my dailies the rest of the week and even manned a cookie table for 2 hours on Sunday at a sledding event for church.

Anyway, at the party we were talking about weight and my friend and I realized that we are wearing roughly the same size right now, but it was different. For her it was a high weight and she was working to turn things around and starting a new formal weight loss program this week. For me it is down 100+ lbs from E2’s birth. I am near the lowest adult weight I can remember.

Are we both overweight? Certainly and we are both working to improve it, but it is mind boggling to think that I’ve lost 100 lbs and still am morbidly obese and yet, when I see my picture there is so much progress there!

I am not certain what my point is here, other than to be aware that what you see may not reflect what you think that person’s story is. If you met me for the first time you may not know I’ve lost as much weight as I have and think I am just another overweight mom.

At my heaviest I remember scanning the room ever time I went into it. If I were the largest person there I would feel uncomfortable. If I had company in my size I felt safer knowing that I was not alone. Weight issues are messy, losing weight is hard, so be mindful of who you meet and what you say.

Despite that tangent I had a solid week. I tracked and did some meal planning that helped. And I saw some results on the scale:

-2.4 Pounds Lost
94.4 lbs lost on WW to Date (128.8 lost total)

Most importantly I have nearly lost all the weight from my holiday trip up/winter depression issues. My light continues to help and I am working hard to be productive as it helps me be more positive with my thinking. I am not “cured” just yet, but I am having more good days than bad ones and for that I am grateful.

I did go to the gym on Monday, not to work out but I went swimming for 1.5 hrs with E1 who was off school. It wasn’t quite “going” to the gym, but it did get me feeling like I might have the courage to get back there soon. It wasn’t as intimidating as I’d thought.

Well, my break is over and I have church programs starting soon so I’ll touch base again later. In the meantime, thank you for your support and keep on fighting for your health. You are worth it. (I am too).